Hey NBC, Grow a Pair!

A Pop Culture Rant from Dean Swift

For a while, I’ve been working on an article entitled “Wuss Nation” in which I bemoan the castration of our once strong union and its populous. The height of my examples was to be a sight that caught my attention in my neighborhood, that of a child riding a tricycle and wearing a helmet. Yes, you read that correctly, the child was not riding a motorcycle or even a bicycle, he was indeed on a tricycle. This pinnacle of absurdity was however completely overshadowed Saturday night by NBC.

If you’ve been under a rock or cloistered away at Trembling Hills Recovery Haven, and haven’t heard about the cartoon brouhaha, it goes something like this… The Danish Newspaper, Jyllands-Posten, published a series of cartoons depicting Mohamed (the prophet, not the boxer or the dude that owns Harrod’s). Some of them portrayed him as a terrorist, others did not, and some were downright silly. The reaction to the cartoons has been over the top, bug-house-crazy. As of Saturday night, 45 people have been murdered as part of numerous demonstrations across multiple continents.

On the news Saturday evening, there was a report about Italian politician, Roberto Calderoli who, during an interview on Italian television, unbuttoned his shirt to reveal one of the offensive cartoons. Only, on NBC, the cartoon was blurred like a Nike swoosh in a rap video. NBC, the network that has no problem offending me with endless images of big breasted young women drinking mikshakes made of maggots and elk turds, was too much of a wuss network to show the damn cartoon on the shirt. I guess they think they are staking out the moral high ground by not offending the Islamic terrorists that are burning embassies BECAUSE OF A CARTOON! Where was this piety when NBC reported on the 1989 art exhibition of Andreas Serrano that featured the piece entitled Piss Christ. For those of you who were under a rock or in Trembling Hills back then, Piss Christ was a photograph of a crucifixion submerged in what was purported to be the artist’s urine. This image was displayed ad nauseum on every media outlet imaginable. The media harped on the image as an example of waste in the Government’s funding of the arts and the reactionary pundits took the bait and ran with it. Mississippi’s own Donald “the Wild Man” Wildmon went so far as to use the Piss Christ image as his fighting banner in a petition campaign to get the government to stop funding the NEA. He wasn’t successful in cutting off the federal funding of the arts, but he gained national recognition in his fruitless pursuit. Had the media (including our pious friends over at NBC) not been so eager to show the Serrano image, I don’t think it would have had nearly the traction. In my humble opinion, it boils down to this, NBC is selectively offensive according to some ass-backwards sense of morality guided by politicaly correct sensibilities.

And by the way, when did the French get more balls than us? While the US media giant NBC cowered, and curled up into the fetal position under the anchor desk, several European newspapers (including several in the former empire of Gaul) published the offending cartoons along with statements regarding freedom of the press as a show of solidarity for Jyllands-Posten. I mean I knew the Danes had some sack (During WWII, Denmark was the only Nazi-occupied country that refused to provide a list of its Jewish citizens.), but REALLY! The Frogs outdid us! I guess as a show of solidarity with the French, I should stop calling my favorite side dish “freedom fries.”

Did NBC stop and think about their position on showing the offensive image. Well, with a little digging, I was able to uncover this spurious NBC memo:






















I guess it figures. It is sad however, that this once proud and fierce nation has stooped to being the Goose to France’s Maverick. I would write more, but I have to go now. My son is on his way home and will certainly want to ride his Big Wheel. I hope I can get the Nerf padding down on the driveway before he arrives, otherwise we’ll just have to talk about how fun it would have been.